Feb. 8th, 2017 03:39 pm
elsewhence: (slytherin free shrugs)
or actually, if the employment agency insists on wanting to see me, i think i can turn it around and use it as an opportunity to turn around and bitch about all the things this training program got massively wrong! i mean, they're the ones who have been paying the training provider a lot of money, i'm sure they'd be interested in hearing about that kind of thing. i refuse to buy the training provider's wimpy-ass excuse that oooh but it was the first time they've ever tried this kind of thing, there were just so many problems that could've been prevented by some basic research before the whole thing ever started. i'm cutting them zero slack. they deserve every kind of trouble i may be able to get them into.

Feb. 6th, 2017 04:00 am
elsewhence: (arkanoid and vaus)
actually, since i've already successfully gotten out of three weeks of utterly wasting my time (though in my defense, two of these were actually spent working on far more important things), let's skip the fourth one as well! it's not like i get paid for being there, or get much of anything out of it at all. much better use of my time to spend the week before the final practical exams relaxing. and with the utter communications breakdown that seems to have taken place, i probably won't even need to actually get a sick note.

(i probably wouldn't even need to call, i can't think of any real consequences that could result from not doing so, but it would be rude.)

Feb. 1st, 2017 10:53 pm
elsewhence: (slytherin free shrugs)
only took you two weeks to realise that half the shit you've been working on is not actually shit any of the tasks we were given ask for! all because "well that's what the documentation on all of our other projects looked like"! am i the only one who actually read all of the damn things??

(P is the worst offender. saw the circuit board and the components that go with it, brightly declared that the exam was basically painting by numbers and would be a breeze to get through, jumped right into working on the written tasks without even taking the sheets they're written on out of the plastic sleeve, then one and a half weeks into what was originally supposed to be two weeks realised that his circuit board didn't actually work and that maybe half of the documentation he'd prepared had anything to do with the one he was supposed to prepare. how did someone like this make it through three and a half years of apprenticeship?)

Jan. 29th, 2017 03:01 am
elsewhence: (common eye spider)
consistent traits of prospective electricians for systems and devices: can't read colour rings on resistors, don't understand transistors, can't keep up with the documentation for their apprenticeships (one guy from the class that started in 2013 hasn't written any in over a year, to think that i was getting really nervous when i reached two months....)

Jan. 17th, 2017 06:45 am
elsewhence: (r2-d2 fail)
okay but come on, they don't even have anything vaguely related for me to do this time, they had me screwing shit together yesterday just to keep me busy, no fucking way am i spending three entire more weeks there. especially not considering that i have to pay for tickets to get there in the first place. they did at least offer i could also work on the documentation for my final exam, except no, i can't, i need an internet-capable computer for that, there's so much stuff i need to look up...

Jan. 16th, 2017 03:19 am
elsewhence: (r2-d2 fail)
one week of pointless "training" avoided, three weeks to go. at least one of which i will fill by feigning some sort of illness, but that's still two to go. and i will get absolutely nothing out of being there (except listening to some podcasts and audiobooks i'd never get around to otherwise, i guess). if i didn't need something plausible-looking to fill that time in my documention, i'd just stop showing up at all! one week was doable because my trainer will believe i just forgot to have them sign that one and do it himself, several might be suspicious.

god how i wish i could talk the people there into not having to show up at all and just signing something that looks right, but that's not exactly something you can bring up casually

actually i could totally just forge the signature, but there's always the slim possibility that someone will ask whether i was really there - if i'd been around for slightly less time than i was supposed to, flawed human memory would probably work in my favour, but if i hadn't been around at all, that would spell trouble

Jan. 7th, 2017 07:25 pm
elsewhence: (arkanoid and vaus)
suddenly supposed to show up to practical "training" with that one company during a week when neither i nor the company in question planned on it => let's forge some documentation and call it free vacation time! this isn't a question of "is this ~*morally right*~" (nothing is, the concept is meaningless), it's a question of "who would this harm" (nobody) and "who is even going to notice" (also nobody). oh, and also "what consequences could it have if someone did notice" (none, kicking me out less than a month before the end of the whole training program would be completely idiotic). might as well take advantage of the fact that for some reason people think of me as a responsible person (hahaha yeah right).

Dec. 6th, 2016 02:17 pm
elsewhence: (r2-d2 fail)
yeah okay i kind of fucked that one up.

50% means you've passed, everything past that is a bonus!! la la la la.

also no fucking way am i going anywhere for the rest of this week, i'll find an excuse of some sort. especially considering i just got the invitation to the final practical exam, meaning that whatever the admission conditions for that are, they have been fulfilled. literally nothing from this point until february 15th actually matters.

oh and obviously i won't show up anywhere after the 15th, either. i mean, what are they going to do about it at that point?

(and i definitely won't show up to anything that sounds like a ceremony. again, what are they going to do?)

Dec. 6th, 2016 06:22 am
elsewhence: (r2-d2 fail)
the invitation to the final written exams says to come to hall 10.2 on the exhibition grounds, which is fair, and to use gate 13 to enter the exhibition grounds, which doesn't exist. i have a reasonable idea where i actually need to go from looking at the map, plus presumably there'll be someone i could ask for help, but still, this is pretty much exactly what i've come to expect. :/

social studies and economics'll be the first exam of the day. why couldn't it have been the last. it'll be the only one that's relaxing in any way, and the only one i have any hope of finishing in less than the assigned time. :/

Dec. 5th, 2016 03:07 pm
elsewhence: (Default)
written portion of final exams tomorrow, let's scream and scream some more! :)

the practical portion isn't until mid-february, for some dumb bullshit reason. going to have to waste all the time until then at that stupid company i've wasted time at before. i'm pretty certain i'll twist an ankle so i won't be able to show up for the whole time or something...

Dec. 2nd, 2016 07:15 am
elsewhence: (arkanoid and vaus)
last school day ever, or at least last school day related to this particular job. and i've never once been late for the entire time. i should be late on purpose today and give the excuse that i really wanted to see how the teacher would react. though we're actually still doing useful stuff, so i shouldn't overdo it. if we were doing the stupid pointless "breakfast and watch a movie" thing i'd shamelessly miss like half an hour of that. (i do think we'll probably get to leave extra early though, simply because the fact that it's the last time we're around at all means there can't possibly be any consequences for us. and i mean, regular fridays end at 1 PM. i'm pretty hopeful in that respect.)

Nov. 15th, 2016 07:06 am
elsewhence: (common eye spider)
observation: sports during the last block today. i'm excused from participating in sports, but still have to be present, aaand nobody present is likely to remember that i'm supposed to be there. conclusion: yeah, i'm going to fuck off after the third block. and, if someone does notice, stubbornly insist that i was actually there and that looking at my general conduct it makes no sense to assume that i would do such a thing. i mean come on, i was never even late or anything...

Oct. 13th, 2016 02:55 am
elsewhence: (r2-d2 fail)
looked through some of the old exams i have copies of, did reasonably well on the multiple choice parts (with the exception of subjects we just plain haven't covered yet) but wasn't able to answer even a single one of the questions that demand written answers, ahaha

how about i just don't go back next week, or ever

Oct. 11th, 2016 02:08 pm
elsewhence: (r2-d2 fail)
positive thing: this week was planned to be a single week of practical training with a company, which would not have benefitted either me or the company, so i asked for permission to use it to prepare for my theoretical exams instead. negative thing: i got permission, but they also told me i didn't even have to come to school, i could just stay at home and do it there. do you think i've gotten anything done so far??

(though don't get me wrong, i think it's perfectly possible to justify "sit at home and relax and do nothing of consequence at all" as preparation. i just also genuinely do need some actual preparation. and also they want to see a schedule of what i did each day next week, but that's so easy to bullshit, as long as i did anything at all.)

Sep. 5th, 2016 04:35 am
elsewhence: (r2-d2 fail)
are you fucking kidding me. defective bottle leaks over contents of bag. of the few things said bag contains, writing pad with only a few scribbles in it is totally fine, empty sketchbook is totally fine, easily replacable book is totally fine, documentation i've had to write and get signed every week for the past almost two years is ruined. almost half of every single sheet is soaked. i was able to carefully seperate it out and use an iron to dry it, so it's at least still legible, but there's no way it would get accepted for its intended purpose (proving that i've learned everything i need to be able to take the final exams) in this state. it's blurred, wrinkled and caramelised and most of the holes have torn. i'll have to redo the whole damn thing. and it was handwritten. i mean, it's it's totally possible to do it by computer, and some of the previous years did, but then one particular class was too idiotic and used the same single writeup for everyone and forgot to change the names to their own before printing them and turning them in to be signed, so everyone after that was forced to do it by hand. in short, the reason never even applied to me because i'm thirty years old and don't need to be taught how to not be an idiot. i'm already a far more refined kind of lazy.

yeah, i wrote an email to the person in charge that explains my situation and dropped the subtle hint that the thought of having to rewrite the whole thing by hand makes me seriously consider whether it wouldn't be easier to just give up this whole training program.

(best part? i left this thing at home whenever possible out of fear of this precise kind of thing. the one day i have no choice but to take it, this happens.)

Sep. 2nd, 2016 07:04 am
elsewhence: (arkanoid and vaus)
now let's just hope we don't actually have school until 3 PM today and they just didn't update the plan properly. we never have school until 3 PM on fridays! everyone's plans revolve around it ending at 1 PM! surely the teacher can't want to stay that long, either? maybe even if it's officially meant to be a long day, he'll just sort of forget about it?

totally different subject, right side of my face has actually cleared up for once, left side is still freaking out! stupid piece of shit. love your body my ass. would you tell an employee who keeps on colossally fucking up his single task "it's okay, you tried so hard! :)"? just because he somehow miraculously managed to be present at all? existing is not a feat that deserves major recognition!

i do like how i sleep on my right side and thereby defy all "helpful" tips about just changing your pillowcase more frequently. honestly at this point i'd actually just straight up punch anyone who tried to give me, personally, that kind of "simple" advice. because it'd be like, do you seriously think i'd still have skin problems at age 30 if getting rid of them was down to something that easy? do you honestly think i haven't already tried it all? nice job implying that i'm either stupid or lazy! thankfully nobody seems to.

Aug. 15th, 2016 03:21 am
elsewhence: (common eye spider)
and in a proud tradition of vacation being over, i won't be able to sleep tonight. or at least not enough to make it worth it.

i should keel over on the table and see what kind of reactions i get.

EDIT: seriously, the one day when i would willingly show up literally the minute the place opens, because the earlier i'm there the earlier i can reasonably leave and hey if i can't sleep anyway why not, it wouldn't make any sense to do so. this is stupid.

Aug. 14th, 2016 02:45 pm
elsewhence: (slytherin free shrugs)
and tomorrow it's off to another fascinating two weeks of wasting time. i mean, technically speaking it's two weeks, then one week of school that i don't need because i've already completed an apprenticeship and still know more or less everything i need about social studies and economics (so i'll probably draw stuff instead, or just straight out fall asleep), then a third week, but we've already established that i'll pretend to be sick for that week...

let's see just how little actual being there i can get away with this time. they didn't seem to notice last time. or they just give precisely as little of a fuck as i do.

Jul. 28th, 2016 06:09 am
elsewhence: (r2-d2 fail)
look, teacher who has kept bothering us for the last couple of days, simple summary for stupid people: we're working on a project that have to turn in friday at the latest, one of us doesn't even have a fully functional program yet, we as a group have finished almost no documentation to speak of, we won't drop work that will be graded and that involves skills relevant to our final exams to make cables for whatever asshole you promised other peoples' time to without checking whether they even have time, if you get in trouble for not living up to your promises you deserve everything that's coming for you and i feel the precise opposite of bad about that because apparently some people just do not learn if they don't have to deal with unpleasant consequences

Jul. 20th, 2016 04:08 pm
elsewhence: (common eye spider)
suddenly add another week of practical training that i didn't know about before, and on top of that make it a bullshit arrangement of two weeks practical training, one week school, one week practical training? whoops guess i'm going to be sick from 5th september until 9th september! how terribly tragic! especially considering that as we all know, i'm far too responsible to miss any days if i can avoid it, so it must be something really bad.

in short, go stick your poor planning up your cunt. i spent several months secure in the certainty that there would be precisely two more weeks of practical training and that's what's going to happen. :)